blog update

hello friends - 

the past year has been an interesting journey with tumblr and social media. after a relationship ended and i moved back to the south, i found that a lot of my “friendships” and “relationships” with people were fragile enough that some folks were not interested in me because i was no longer in a certain place or certain relationship. i have felt judgment and the silence that resulted from it as well as folks taking sides. that’s hurt a lot and has also made it a little difficult for me to be present on tumblr and center my writing and other things that help me cope with the world. 

i know that i’ve also been bad at keeping in touch with folks and being a friend. 

i am considering making a side blog to this one in hopes of centering my writing again and re/building the relationships that i need with other qtpoc. 

please let me know and reach out to me (you can respond to this post or send me a message) if you would be interested in being connected through a side blog that i hope will again be vulnerable and intimate and present as this blog was before. i might reach out to some of y’all, too!! 




the worst kind of shitty people are the ones who are shitty and want to bend reality so that everyone around them thinks that they aren’t the shitty one—that actually everyone is being shitty to them. 

You know what’s worse? When they bend reality so well that people actually believe that they aren’t that bad and you’re just overreacting.

shitty people do too much

the worst kind of shitty people are the ones who are shitty and want to bend reality so that everyone around them thinks that they aren’t the shitty one—that actually everyone is being shitty to them. 

#WCW #amc2014 #teamnoworkshops #teamchronicpain #teamatecheesecakeinbed

#WCW #amc2014 #teamnoworkshops #teamchronicpain #teamatecheesecakeinbed


diaspora: to be a child of the war even decades after the war ended

For blacks, the “war on terror” hasn’t “come ‘home.’” It’s always been here. How then might we consider the emphasis on the militarization of policing as the problem as another example of “the precariousness of empathy”? The problem with casting militarization as the problem is that the formulation suggests it is the excess against which we must rally. We must accept that the ordinary is fair, for an extreme to be the problem. The policing of black people — carried out through a variety of mechanisms and processes — is purportedly warranted, as long as it doesn’t get too militarized and excessive.
yes let’s congregate here animals 

yes let’s congregate here animals 

[photo set description: first three images are centered on a group of Black men who seem to be speaking in front of a camera crew. in one photo one of the men raising his arms up. the last photo is of a line of police who are in their riot gear including shields and helmets, in front of a large police vehicle.] 


Before CNN, who just arrived, tries to skew these stories. These two men were saying “this are my tax dollars” pointing at the SWAT vehicles and police officers “This is what we go through everyday.” “This has been taken to another level” “We’re subject to this stuff on a regular basis” “Yall got gas masks on. Don’t cut it out. Show the people what’s real” “The media says we’re provoking this. We aint doin nothin” “Yall got fully automatic weapons on us. Aint nobody armed out here”.

what if white people started telling each other “go to sleep america” instead of “wake up america” and they might all just go to sleep forever?

i’m becoming increasingly annoyed by the amount of self-proclaimed anti-racist white ppl i have in my social media sphere who will talk about anything but the current state of the world, but not only are they avoiding Ferguson, police brutality, anti-blackness, etc, they are actively posting shit like “today was such an amazing day!”


y’all, i called this shit. white lefty leftist anarchist communists whatever the fuck are taking to ferguson to try to incite their version of “revolution” that doesn’t honor the self-determination of the Black communities there and is definitely not a show of solidarity

all you white and non-Black ~*lefty leftists*~ getting voyeuristic hard ons for the rebellion that is happening in Ferguson need to get your shit together before you try to go organize ~*solidarity actions*~ without actually talking to any Black people and communities 

it’s totally possible to be concerned with and upset by and angered by more than 1 thing at once. the idea that we can only be thinking or talking or mourning about 1 thing at once is totally how this fucking shithole of capitalism + white supremacy + etc wants us to be so that we slowly lose context of how murders and violence in the west fuel and work concurrently with murders and violence elsewhere. 

[image description: two screenshots of tweets by Imani ABL @angryblack lady. the first one reads, “I saw so many people on Twitter saying “I don’t want to have/raise black children in this country.” That is a reproductive justice issue.” the second one reads, “let me repeat that: police violence against black and brown people is a reproductive justice issue.”]



This is truth…said so as well. Feel so as well. 

Oh and, the cops threw a Black pregnant woman on the ground on her stomach last night in Ferguson, MO…

reblogging because black lives matter.

several years back we thought about bringing my grandma from viet nam to spend up to 6 months with us. it’s too late to do it now because she’s too old and her health is too poor to travel. but when we were discussing it one of the biggest things that came up was that we were scared she would be sad, spending most of the week at home and waiting around as my mom worked and i did school. 

and we would talk about the possibility that she would be unhappy without speaking a single breath to our own daily grind that made us sad and long for a brief second to breathe or a brief second to be held and comforted by my grandmother, my mom’s mom. 

i still think about that from time to time- our total disregard for the reality that we weren’t all that happy, struggling, being broke all of the time, spending most of our waking hours outside of the house we would later lose. 

i’m not sure why i’m thinking about this right now. i think i just really miss my grandma.